We have had the opportunity to visit some interesting places with this conference, although it seems that we always fill the time with the work and don't manage to do the sightseeing we envision in advance. Because of the kids, staying longer or going earlier is rarely an option. Still, these conferences, while exhausting, are always rejuvenating in terms of all the new ideas we come home with. (We have also attended the chemical engineering conferences a few times in November- AIChE.)
Since starting at Calvin we have attended:
2002 Indianapolis - AIChE (18-month-old James came along and we traded watching him and attending.)2004 Salt Lake City (James stayed with Grandma/Grandpa and we traveled alone.)
2005 Cincinatti - AIChE (Grandpa Tom came along to watch James and Maggie during the day.)
2006 Chicago (Grandma Di came and stayed with us and James and Margaret)
2008 Pittsburgh (Grandma Di AND Grandpa Glen came, staying with James, Margaret, & John)
2009 Austin (Just Jeremy and I went, leaving 3 kids with Grandma/Grandpa)
2011 Vancouver, BC (Jeremy and I and Helen went, leaving 3 kids with Grandma/Grandpa)
So, each year is a new puzzle to figure out in terms of childcare, but thanks to generous grandparents, we have made it mostly work.
This year, I presented a paper, and met with my research collaborators, who also presented two other papers from our work group. Jeremy moderated a few sessions. There are always plenty of sessions we just want to attend/watch, also, so we were busy, from the 7 AM start-time until the 5 or 6 PM end each day. Having Helen along with us, with no one to watch her, was a new piece in the puzzle this year. I wasn't sure how it would work.
As it turned out, it worked amazingly well. For most of the conference, Helen just rode around with me in the Baby Bjorn or Moby Wrap carriers. She would enthusiastically people watch as we walked around the convention center, and during some sessions. Then, I would sit and nurse her in the sessions and she would often drift off to sleep for a long enough period of quiet that I could stay in the room. When she got talkative or fussy, I walked the hallways for a while, or outside along the harbour. When I absolutely needed to attend a particular session, then I handed her off to Jeremy for a few hours, and they took a walk together in the Exhibit Hall. She became quite well-known at the conference. Even at ASEE, with over 3,700 attending, people started to recognize her, and 9 times out of 10, broke into a big grin whenever they saw her walking by. I have never had so many people at a conference smile at me (though it wasn't really at me so much as at Helen).
The tone was set the first morning as I walked into the main plenary session in the Grand Ballroom, set with a thousand chairs or more. I was a bit apprehensive about taking her into a professional conference. However, Helen was absolutely content and quiet in the back of the room as people streamed in past her. Then it got quiet and dark for the ker, and Helen started to fuss. Embarassed, I wisked her out quickly. But I had really wanted to hear that speaker, so I started her nursing and tiptoed back in. Then, looking for just a bit more privacy, I made a fortuitous discovery. I slipped behind the floor-to-ceiling heavy black drapes in the back of the ballroom and found that I could still hear the speaker. I couldn't see the slides, but Oh joy! I had a fabulous panorama view of the harbour through 3-storey tall glass, instead. Best coference talk, ever!
I relaxed a bit as the first day wore on. Perhaps it was just because that first day, I was mostly attending sessions in the Women in Engineerin Division, with gender-related topics, but Helen seemed welcome. Several women leaned over to me with smiles to say something like, "Oh, I remember when I brought my baby here; it seems like just yesterday and now he is 20!"
On the other hand, on the 3rd day, we met our friend Laura for lunch. Laura, an acquaintance from grad school, is a professor of chemical engineering and is pregnant with her 5th child. (Her husband is a stay-at-home dad, thanfully.) She has also had to manage travel over the years with children and infants. This time, her youngest is four years old and she was traveling solo. She expressed some surprise that I was trying the conference with a nursing infant, and asked how it was going. She volunteered to me that she had heard people say things to the effect of, "I can't believe that woman is here with a baby!" Laura didn't explain whether this was in the tone of, "Right on, sister!" or "How dare she!" but I decided not to clarify further. Sometimes, it is just better not to know what people we don't know are saying behind our backs, don't you think?
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| The view from our 9th-story Vancouver hotel room. |
Helen did amazingly well with the (lack of) schedule. She nursed and slept for pretty much the entire plane rides to Vancouver- not a peep. We arrived at our hotel at 10:30 PM (make that 1:30 AM for Helen's body clock, due to time change) and she cheerfully went right back to sleep. She slept through each night as usual, waking only to eat, and cheerfully let us rouse her at whatever time we needed each morning. There was only one evening when she had a very minor meltdown at dinner (she wanted to be in a quieter place to sleep); otherwise she just adapted.
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| Self portrait while clowning around killing time outside a conference session with a talkative baby. |
When it was time for my paper presentation Thursday morning, the wife of a colleague from Calvin who was also traveling offered to babysit for an hour. They reportedly had a great time together. When we were in the smaller CEEC (the follow-on conference with only about 35 attendees), I frequently walked Helen in the back of the seminar room, and she was content. She slept about two hours in the arms of another attendee who said he was anxiously awaiting grandkids and loved the chance to hold a baby. Altogether, it was fine to have her there and I think she will be remembered well.
We caught the redeye flight home, which turned out to be a more brutal schedule than I had imagined. It made sense to book it at the time.
PRO: Get home at 9 AM Saturday instead of 6 PM, so we can see the 3 older kids a day sooner.
PRO: Much cheaper flight
PRO: Save a night in a hotel that wouldn't be much sleep anyway since we would have to be awake at dawn for an early morning flight.
CON: Didn't actually get sleep at all, really.The Vancouver to Chicago flight was only 3.5 hours flight time. So, we started for the airport at 6 PM for our 11 PM flight. (Walk 45 minutes from Granville Island back to our car, negotiate around the Canada Day parade that, BONUS!, turned out to be routed right past the parking garage we had chosen, at just the time we needed to leave, drive 60 minutes to airport, make several detours to find gas station to fill up rental car, return car, find international terminal, discover it is closed for the night, find different international terminal, wait in line for an hour to check in, find dinner at the few open food places in the airport, make it to gate just at 10:30 boarding.) We finally managed about an hour of fitful sleep on the plane, between safety announcements, beverage service, and Helen waking up to fuss and have a very messy diaper. (This was the first time she started to show the signs of so much travel for the week, since she never has a messy diaper overnight.)
Then in Chicago, we had to claim all our baggage, shuffle through immigration and customs, recheck our bags, go through security again, now with all the early AM airport crowd, and get to our next gate. We waited about 45-60 minutes to board the plane for the last 25-minute hop home. We were very grateful that Glen was there to pick us up as I am not sure if either of us could have managed driving home.
It was wonderful to see the kids again, but I wasn't much of a parent to them that day. While we were gone, they had spent the 6 days at Glen and Diana's house. Their 3 older cousins were there, also, so it was a fun week for all. Grandma's cooking is always a hit. They attended Vacation Bible School at Grandpa/ma's church, which was apparently a big hit. After Glen and Di left our house, I was sitting in our recliner nursing Helen and trying to listen to the three older ones tell me about their week. John was proudly displaying a poster he had brought home from the church program, and I thought I was displaying enough enthusiasm for it until he stopped. I heard a disembodied 4-year-old voice tell me, "Mom? Mom! You need to OPEN your eyes to see it!" Hmm, sure enough. That was the first time I realized they had been closed, I guess I was tired.
That night, Helen showed her one small rebellion for all the traveling and crazy schedules. After eating at 3 AM, she decided she would rather play than fall back asleep. She has really never done that before, and we had taken her through two 3-hour time changes and one sleepless traveling night in one week, so i can hardly begrudge her this. And she was remarkably good natured about it all. She just kicked and fussed until we turned a light on, then she smiled contentedly and cooed to us. She also repeated, several times, what sounded distressingly like her first word, carefully pronounced in a pleasantly mocking, sing-song tone: "Ha-Ha." I think we might be in trouble with this one.
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